 |
Taking Stock |
|
MISSION & LIFE
PHILIPPINES
Feedback on this article? write to
|
We are all parents of the future generation Noel was 35 years old. He has gone ahead of us but taught us one important lesson in life. The author is a Filipino priest serving in a parish of Metro Manila, Philippines. Three years ago, Noel was diagnosed to have leukemia. Since then, his life has been a long, painful struggle against the fatal illness coupled with the will to survive the many medical interventions. I am sure that his family did everything to offer his wife and children hope that there was still a chance to beat the dreadful enemy. But in the end, Noel realized that the battle was lost. He then so willingly allowed God to take full control of his life. During his last few days, I had the chance to be part of his journey. Sister Joyce Pavino, a member of the Couples for Christ, requested me to give the last rites for Noel. Seeing his almost skeletal frame, I thought of consoling him with “white lies”, perhaps in my desire to make him believe that a miracle was still possible. But when I saw his face looking at the crucified Christ hanging on the wall, I saw the strength of a man who was no longer afraid to face his end. As a former lay minister of our parish, he dreamt of serving the Lord to the end. But his illness had cruelly interrupted that dream and forced him to let go of the work that he had earnestly loved. His illness however, did not stop him from serving the Lord because in his suffering, he found a new way of service and a source of life for others. I asked his wife Mira about the things she and her kids shared with Noel. She said oftentimes when they were with him inside the room, they would recite the Rosary together as a family. Also, there are times his frail body could no longer appreciate the laughter and playful moments of his two daughters but nevertheless, they would still find him expressing his joy upon seeing them in their fun moments. Deep in his heart though, he felt the increasing awareness that slowly his candle of life was burning out and that each day was a time to let go; of his kids, his wife, his family and friends and that he was entering a time of many goodbyes. Making a gift As I reflected upon Noel’s preparation for his own death, I gradually realized that he was making his own dying more and more a gift for others. Not only for his wife and children but also for his friends and for the many circles of people with whom he shared and spoke his life with. Not having had the joy of living longer, and perhaps not becoming a parent to more children with Mira, he nevertheless became a parent to many through the way he lived towards his death. He showed us, in a whole new way, what it means to die. Noel has become, so to speak, a parent to us all. New life I finished the rite and went back to the convent but my encounter with Noel has made me reflect on Jesus’ words when He too was facing His own death. The words of Jesus struck me once again and I was inclined to look at death in a new way. When Jesus was speaking to His disciples about His imminent death, He said: “It is for your own good that I am going because if I go, I can send you the Holy Spirit and the Spirit will reveal to you the things to come.” Perhaps, this was what Noel wanted to say before he died; that his death will give new life to those who will mourn. And I believe that this was evident in the way Mira handled his loss. The spirit of Noel’s love for her had strengthened her in accepting his death and in moving on with life. The strength of her faith is the fruit brought about by the demise of Noel. I know that years after, he will continue to bear fruit in the life of Mira because it will become a life guided by the spirit of his love for her and his kids. Becoming fruitful These reflections show that the real question before our death is not on how much we can still accomplish or how much influence we can still exert but on how we can so live that we can continue to be fruitful even when we’re no longer here with our family and friends. Noel’s death poses a challenge for all of us. While our society keeps asking about the tangible results of our lives, we must gradually learn that they may or may not prove to be important. What really counts are the fruits that it bears. As we grow older and weaker, we will be able to do less and less. Both our bodies and our minds will become weaker. Our eyes will move closer to the book we want to read and our ears close to the person we are trying to understand. Our failing memories will lead us to repeat our stories more often and our decreasing ability to reflect critically will turn us into a boring person to talk with. However, we trust that in our weaknesses, God’s spirit will manifest itself and that from our deteriorating bodies and minds, God’s spirit will move where it wants and bear fruit. And so in our death, something good will come out. Something that lies beyond our time. Something that will last and will carry on from one generation to another. In this way, all of us after our death will become a new parent, a parent of the new generation.<WM Fr. Danny Ferrandiz2003©World Mission Magazine |
